AfterLove

We all have, our place in this world.

Sometimes it's not, as great as we hoped.

While we still cope.

Sometimes its hard, to see through the smoke.

It's hard to even, think clear.

It's hard to sit, without you being here.

I hit the road, but the suns in my eyes.

No matter which, way I turn.

Something reminds me, of you.

.

It ain't worth it for me to smile.

Not having you to smile with.

.

It ain't worth it to fall asleep.

Not having you to wake up, by my side

.

Jokes just ain't funny.

Not having you to laugh along with me.

.

It ain't even worth it, for me to eat.

Not hearing the annoying clink, of your plate next to me.

.

Nothings the same as it used to be.

Sitting in my own home, even feels strange.

I wish I could show you how I've changed.

Only, I haven't.  I'm still the same.

.

I've progressed, but progress isn't success, or accomplishments.

It's only a millimeter in a mile.  Which doesn't make cents.

It's being 22 when projected death is 3x as long as this.

.

You can say, "I love you," but,

I would just quit.

This is moving all to quick,

for me to get a grip. 

And the way I see the stitch is.

You don't even know what love is.

The Break-Up

If you fucking wanna do drugs, then fine!

Just fucking leave me out of it.

I'm so sick of your shit.

It always seems like the same argument.

What the fuck, do you mean?!

You bring all this bullshit to me.

If there's something about me, you don't like,

then just fucking pack your shit and leave.

Come on, please!

You know, I don't want to leave.

I love you, I only care about you, 

I just want you, to care about you,

as much as I, care about you.

Honestly, I understand you, Baby I do.

The reality is, I'm gonna do,

what I wanna do, regardless of you.

What your doing is STUPID!!!

Don't you think I know that! 

I know I'm outta control, I just wish,

you'd fucking leave me alone.

It was just one, tiny, exstacy tablet.

If you ask me, your over reactin'.  

Over, reacting? Over, reacting?

I'll fucking show you an overreaction.

Why do you insist, on acting like this?

All I fucking want to do help?

Help? I don't fucking need your help!

Once, again if you don't like it, then leave.

All you fucking do is push me away.

You say, you only ate one.

Well, I found four more, on the floor board,

and I'm sure there were much more.

You gotta understand,

I didn't mean, for things to happen like this.

You mean, 

you didn't mean for this to happen?

Or you mean,

you didn't mean to get caught?

You knew, 

I was coming over tonight.

You know, 

how much I hate seeing you like this.

I just,
wanted to spend time with you.

Not this X'd out fool.

I know I always wreck everything. 

I'd apologize, but I've apologized

so many times, it really, doesn't mean anything.

I'm no longer asking, I'm telling you to leave.

Fine! If you don't care, how much I care.

I'll pack my stuff and leave.

much, much later.

I don't know who it is I'm running from faster.
Is it you or me? This house, this road, or this town?
Shuffling through women in digits.
Is it what it is or isn't it just a disguise.
That hides them from me. Or me from me?
Awkwardness tinted behind shaded frames.
Feelings concealed by minutes of giggles.
Hatred is trapped, still lurking.
Searching for a victim.
Disappearing into the pavement.
They say misery loves company,
So accompany me, with an extension cord,
to the edge of this balcony.
Face-plant and splat fast.
Crap my pants and brag about it.
An ass shake, takes heart break, and makes
a wiggle a little more, more than already is little.
I look low and high.  Feel more low, the more high.
I've drew a circle in the sand.
Go to grab my hand and fall flat.

I love the lady behind the desk.
It's not her hair, it's not her smile.
Instead, its what she represents.
She's the consistency I seek and need.
Wake up and eat, go to leave, wave and feel relieved.
Its silly I know, but at least I know.
when i go, there's someone to know, though i know i go alone.
Hit the pavement, avoid the rain, stamp my way down the lane.
Arrive to the same place I hate.
A zombified sheep, I leap and reach,
the conclusions they lead me to reach.
I think I'd like to think.
I'd like to think, but think it's hard to think.
I fall in line, hit the road, and travel to my abode.
The lady behind the desk smiles and waves.